Monthly Archives: May 2015

Spending time with our loved ones, spending time for our loved ones – Which makes more sense?

spending-time-with-loved-ones

My first daughter Cathy (6) doesn’t always love to play alone. She always wants me to play with her. Sometimes, just to make her feel happy, I used to go play with her (after all it’s going to take couple of minutes to play a game!) and most of the times, I ask her to play something else and mention her that am busy with my _____.(cooking, cleaning, etc.). This happens all the time and one such moment turned out to be my learning moment. Yes, a BIG one! 🙂

Here is what happened:

My weekends are more tightly scheduled than my weekdays. In one particular weekend, my girl was insisting me to play with her which totally irritated me. I put aside all my work and thought of giving her some good advice so that she won’t come and ask again!

I asked her to sit with me in the couch. I explained her that am cooking her favourite dish, planning for evening outing and hence I don’t have time to sit and play. I also added that, only if she can play by herself, I can finish the things and join her in the evening outing to the beach.

Her answer stunned me.  She looked at me and said “ma, what is the use of doing a lot of things for me but not spending time with me! You are the one whom I need than what all you do for me. I always love to be with you. I won’t deny it if you ask me to be with you!” She said all these and ran away to play.

I was stunned by her reply and speechless for a moment! W-H-A-T?! She doesn’t need anything else other than me!??? Not an outing, not a delicious meal, nothing?!

All of a sudden, I put everything aside and sat for a moment and put myself in the situation. I could relate what she said. I too love a particular person’s presence (hubby/mother/father/friend) than the things they do for me. Sometimes I like them to do things for me. But, most of the times, the one-one time looks more precious than anything else! How I missed this simple truth and made my little one sad!

How much I missed the good moments with my loved ones by doing things for them other than spending time with them!

I could have planned things the day before and could have sent off my hubby & kids with a kiss and a smiling face when they go out in the morning.

Instead of browsing the internet, hunting a delicious healthy recipe, I could have spent an hour with my kids who wanted me to tell them stories.

I could have spent some more time with God other than just thinking about my unending task list and neglecting him for just  hurrying to finish all those endless tasks in that list!

And the list goes on!

I should wake up now at least!  Let me start spending time with my loved ones other than just keep on doing things for them.

God also wants us to do the same. He needs us other than ourselves running here and there and doing a lot of things for Him. Yes, He feels loved when we spend time with Him.

There is a very small incident in the bible which tells about two sisters “Martha & Mary”.

 Jesus visits Martha & Mary in their home. Martha was busy preparing meals for Jesus on the other hand Mary sat with Jesus and was hearing what HE said. Martha was quite irritated and asks Jesus to tell Mary to help her in her tasks. Jesus replied: “Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Whenever I read this incident, I sense like, Jesus didn’t get the point of Martha! She is preparing meals for Him, but he is harsh enough to say that is actually not necessary!

But that long time question got cleared by my little angel. Yes, Jesus wants to spend time with HIM other than just doing things for Him! How foolish am I to think HIS answer was harsh enough to hurt Martha! Oh! Am totally clear now!

Now am learning to spend time with my loved ones other than just doing things for them.

What will be your response when it is asked that spending time with our loved ones is better or doing things for them is better?

 

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Why This Blog??

 

why-this-blog

 

There are tons of blogs in the whole blog world. Some are unique, some are so popular, some are just normal ones, some didn’t get noticed at all and the list goes on. My blog, striving to be simple is an addition of one more blog in that blog world. I’m just a drop in that ocean. In that case: why this blog? What is striving to be simple all about? Before moving on to that question, I would like to say a little bit of myself.

A little History

From my school days, I love to teach/tell others what I learned, right from mathematics!.Whenever I find some easy way to do the homework or anything else, I used to spread it to my classmates and friends. Especially those who struggle in doing homework or anything else, find easy to approach me and ask how to complete/ understand it easily. I used to help them [if I know the solution!], and that delights me all the time. Not only maths, but I have a thirst to analyze and learn to do things in a simpler way in my day to day life. I’m not only interested in learning all by myself but to share all my learning & experiences to everyone. So, I ended up with this blog.

The Reason behind the name “striving to be simple.”

I love doing things in a simpler way. I love to optimize my day to day life tasks in order to avoid wearing out doing the same task every single day. I look out for simple ways to do even a usual task. (I have a confession here! I do a lot of thinking and plan out for doing my works simpler, I still have difficulty in executing those. Yep, am that much lazy! Am working on that part now). Right from cooking to personal relationships, I love simplicity. Living simply is my passion.

I don’t say that I’ve attained simplicity, for it’s a lifetime journey. I’ve started to live simple by making simple choices in my day to day life.
So, I named my blog “Striving to be simple.”

This blog is not intended to get more traffic nor targeted to be popular. All the posts are written out of care and concern so that it may help someone somewhere who needs it more. My wish will be fulfilled even if my posts reach one person who gets clarity in their struggling area after reading my post.

What will be in this blog?

Lots of real life stories accompanied with what I learned from those experiences.

Simple recipes

Important happenings in my life

Simple organizational schedules, tried out tips, failed organizational routines

Simple craft/sewing projects that we tried at home (only when I try [;-D])

When can you expect a post from me?

Currently, I’m planning to publish two posts a week.

One post on Tuesday and next on Friday at 10 o’clock in the morning (IST)

Ok friends, I have written what all came up related to this blog. Besides to that, is there anything I should consider regarding this blog? If so, what are they?

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Learning Moment: How is giving love to others look like?

love

I have two girl children aged 6 and 2 and I’m a stay at home mom. So, we three happened to spend more time together. Some days are so enjoyable, some are stressful and some are bland and normal. I used to learn at-least one little thing from my day to day life, that too from my children. This is one such incident, which turned out to be a great learning moment. It gave me a new perspective in the joy of giving love to others without expectation.

My second one has started to talk few words. She is trying to understand our conversations. Sometimes, she misunderstands our questions and give hilarious replies. We all have a good time hearing her talk and she also enjoys talking to us.

One such misunderstanding made me learn few things about giving love to others.

This is what happens all the time:

Whenever she kisses me, I ask her “Now, it’s mommy’s turn, where you want kisses baby?” Instead of asking for a kiss, she points out my forehead and kisses my forehead. If I ask, “then??” She continues to point out another place and gives a kiss. She keeps repeating it until I stop asking for it.

It’s always a happy treat for me. She never expects me to kiss. All she does is giving lots of kisses until I stop asking for it. She runs with a big smile once she kisses. It delights her, and it delights me more!

This reminds me in the joy of giving others without any expectation. She didn’t expect a return or concerned about getting an appreciation and all she did was giving what I needed. What if, I can give love to others without expecting any reward or love in return? Yes, that should be the best thing I can ever do to touch others lives. There will be no regrets, no pain and all I get is a flawless happiness that no human can give. The key is, there is no expectation in that love.

That’s why, God also insisted in having a child like heart. While reading the bible, I feel God did the same while He was on Earth. He gave happiness, love & affection to all the people He met. He touched millions of life. Nothing stopped Him from doing it. It’s all because, He never expected anything in return. He never expected them to understand His love, be His disciples or anything else. All He did was: He gave LOTS of love. He preached not only when a lot of people surrounded him, but also did the same when there is only one needy person. Each soul seemed to be important to Him. He did miracles not only in public but also in the places where no one notices. That is true love. That brings lots of happiness to both giving & receiving ends.

I learned that, love is spontaneous when there is no expectation. Love is bold when there is no fear or question of receiving it back. Love delights the receiving ends when there is no expectation of returning back.

Have you ever tasted the joy of giving love without any expectations? Does any interesting conversation/moment turn out to be a learning experience for you?

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