Spending time with our loved ones, spending time for our loved ones – Which makes more sense?

By | May 29, 2015


My first daughter Cathy (6) doesn’t always love to play alone. She always wants me to play with her. Sometimes, just to make her feel happy, I used to go play with her (after all it’s going to take couple of minutes to play a game!) and most of the times, I ask her to play something else and mention her that am busy with my _____.(cooking, cleaning, etc.). This happens all the time and one such moment turned out to be my learning moment. Yes, a BIG one! 🙂

Here is what happened:

My weekends are more tightly scheduled than my weekdays. In one particular weekend, my girl was insisting me to play with her which totally irritated me. I put aside all my work and thought of giving her some good advice so that she won’t come and ask again!

I asked her to sit with me in the couch. I explained her that am cooking her favourite dish, planning for evening outing and hence I don’t have time to sit and play. I also added that, only if she can play by herself, I can finish the things and join her in the evening outing to the beach.

Her answer stunned me.  She looked at me and said “ma, what is the use of doing a lot of things for me but not spending time with me! You are the one whom I need than what all you do for me. I always love to be with you. I won’t deny it if you ask me to be with you!” She said all these and ran away to play.

I was stunned by her reply and speechless for a moment! W-H-A-T?! She doesn’t need anything else other than me!??? Not an outing, not a delicious meal, nothing?!

All of a sudden, I put everything aside and sat for a moment and put myself in the situation. I could relate what she said. I too love a particular person’s presence (hubby/mother/father/friend) than the things they do for me. Sometimes I like them to do things for me. But, most of the times, the one-one time looks more precious than anything else! How I missed this simple truth and made my little one sad!

How much I missed the good moments with my loved ones by doing things for them other than spending time with them!

I could have planned things the day before and could have sent off my hubby & kids with a kiss and a smiling face when they go out in the morning.

Instead of browsing the internet, hunting a delicious healthy recipe, I could have spent an hour with my kids who wanted me to tell them stories.

I could have spent some more time with God other than just thinking about my unending task list and neglecting him for just  hurrying to finish all those endless tasks in that list!

And the list goes on!

I should wake up now at least!  Let me start spending time with my loved ones other than just keep on doing things for them.

God also wants us to do the same. He needs us other than ourselves running here and there and doing a lot of things for Him. Yes, He feels loved when we spend time with Him.

There is a very small incident in the bible which tells about two sisters “Martha & Mary”.

 Jesus visits Martha & Mary in their home. Martha was busy preparing meals for Jesus on the other hand Mary sat with Jesus and was hearing what HE said. Martha was quite irritated and asks Jesus to tell Mary to help her in her tasks. Jesus replied: “Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Whenever I read this incident, I sense like, Jesus didn’t get the point of Martha! She is preparing meals for Him, but he is harsh enough to say that is actually not necessary!

But that long time question got cleared by my little angel. Yes, Jesus wants to spend time with HIM other than just doing things for Him! How foolish am I to think HIS answer was harsh enough to hurt Martha! Oh! Am totally clear now!

Now am learning to spend time with my loved ones other than just doing things for them.

What will be your response when it is asked that spending time with our loved ones is better or doing things for them is better?


Please follow and like us: